This is my first book review. I picked this book up at the library. I don't want to commit to buying something that may not be helpful, i.e. I am CHEAP!!!! Where to begin...I guess I'll do the bad first. The book is definitely geared towards older moms (35+) who were on the career track, and 'forgot' to have kids or thought they had plenty of time. This part can be down right infuriating for a younger reader. It makes you feel almost as if you shouldn't be having this problem because you are in your 'prime.' It seems to invalidate the feelings of the young infertiles because we are not "running out of time." In my situation we are...MH is going to be 36 and will not have children past 40. Being young doesn't take the pain and grief out of being infertile. Also, the book focuses on recurrent loss because that was the situation for one of the authors. On one hand this was valuable information, but on the other it added a whole new dimension to my stress levels. Thinking about miscarriage, while a reality, is not something I can or need to focus on at this juncture. The book doesn't talk about any treatments in great detail, nor do they really cover any reasons for infertility besides being old. Last thing this book was not written by anyone in the medical profession.
OK, on to the more positive stuff. Since the book was not written by medical professionals it is very conversational and easy to read. There are many things this book covers that the experts don't: what it is really like to miscarry, what IVF meds really do to your body, etc. The book also covers alternative treatments like acupuncture, chiropractics, and herbs in depth. These are helpful things to know and consider that your doctor may not tell you. The things I really loved were the chapters about keeping your marriage intact, and what men are really feeling through this process. In that regard I felt less alone, and like the behavior of MH was normal, or at least occurred in other men. There was also great advice about how to keep infertility from completely devouring you. Sometimes you need to read that it is OK to do other things besides focus on your infertility. I often feel that I will be 'punished' if I am not constantly vigilant and focused on my fertility issues. The tips and tricks on how to stay positive were also a God-send for me because I really let negative things and thoughts spin out of control when I really need to be less stressed and in a positive mind-frame. Lastly, the authors provide empathetic, but frank answers to the dreaded "When is enough, enough?" question.
The book on the whole was OK, and I would recommend checking it out...to me it is not a 'buy.' Warning: there are stories the will scare the bejeezus out of you. If you are not in the right place to read any horror stories don't read it, or at least be very careful in your skimming.
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1 comment:
Great work.
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