Lilypie 1st Birthday Ticker

Thursday, February 21, 2008

6w2d I Want Morning Sickness

I never thought I would begging for morning sickness, but here I am. Every morning I wonder "Is today the day?" Morning sickness seems so reassuring. It's the cardinal sign of really being pregnant, and I want it. I want it all. Horror of horrors I have even been entertaining the idea of natural child-birth!!!! Yes, I am crazy, and I fully, fully expect to change my mind on this point. Yes, I may in fact be turning into one of those weird crunchy-granola mothers who hang around Weaver Street Market (my CH girls will know EXACTLY what I'm talking about) picture Whole Foods on crack...expounding the virtues of hemp baby wear and making your own organic/vegan baby food.

I digress. I read in my Mayo Clinic book that morning sickness and other pregnancy symptoms before 8 weeks lessens the risk of miscarriage. So, obviously I want to have as many symptoms as humanly possible. I'm so terrified that le bebe is going to be dead, or that there won't even be a baby in the sac at my ultrasound. I've tried to talk to MH about this, but he just gets pissed at me for not be positive and not trusting the RE. For the record the RE said "It would probably be fine." That's all you get in this life-probably. Probably is not definitely...they can't promsie that. Why can't he understand that bad things happen to infertiles everyday? Miscarriages, blighted ovums, dead babies, pre-term labor resulting in dead babies these things happen, and it is a reality. It is not something I've made up like contracting ebola from the strange coughing man next to me on the T. I know I am a hypochodriac, OK I KNOW! I guess I need him to admit that yes things could go wrong, but that we'll go on, that we'll survive, and that we'll keep trying.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Here I am 2 months later - at 6w2d myself - having stumbled across your post as I too await some morning sickness. I'd be quite happy with a dry reach actually. :) I'm now going to read on to see how you got on.